I can remember staring Into her eyes,
Wishing somehow this pain would subside,
Must I really forgive her,
Must I lay down my pride!
She doesn’t deserve it…
But neither did I…
My heart feels like breaking,
And my eyes want to cry,
Lord grant me the courage,
Make me willingly to die.
There is a person in my life that loves me like no other, but hurts me like no one else. Sometimes I just want to scream with the pain and agony they put me through. Why, I ask? How can they really do this? If they say they love me, then why? Blindness. Jesus cried out, “ Oh Father forgive them, for they know not what they do!” As hard as it may seem, and as much as I want to blame them, they simply do not see. Martyrs, blood, pain…death! We hear the stories, we know the words, but how can we feel so distant? We have all heard the stories of courageous martyrs that joyfully give their lives everyday for Christ’s sake. With a gun pointed at their head, the have declared, “Jesus, Thou art Lord, Thou art Christ, Thou art my Savior!” And though their physical life may have ceased, their true life had only begun. Now we hear the question posed to us, “Would you deny Christ if a gun was aimed at your head?” Would you be willingly to die for the sake of Christ? And though it may not be with a gun pointed to our heads, we have all had the chance to die for Christ? Everyday, every second, you will ever live, you will have the opportunity to die for Christ… A Chance to Crucify self, Just as He crucified Himself for you. – I have never really thought about this, not only does the cross represent our salvation, but the understanding of our Savior. Jesus (Heb. 4:14-16) was not kidding when He declared that He was our High Priest and understands everything we go through. He knows how it feels to have your heart ripped out; He knows how it feels to be put to death by the very ones He loved so much. He understands. Life throws so many situations our way, and in every decision, we have a choice. We have a choice to love others more than ourselves; we have a choice to die for Christ. There are so many situations that seem so small and worthless, but oh, if we could see what God sees. If we could see the opportunity, we have to show God how grateful we are for what He has done. A squabble with a sibling, an argument with a parent, may seem so menial, but in reality, how we react in these situations is a decision between life and death. Whatever you do in life. You will always have a choice between living for yourself or living for God. Every time you choose to live for God, your flesh, your self will die. And though a person maybe piercing your hands with nails and beating you with a whip, they are not unreachable, they are not unlovable, they are not unforgivable. Jesus understands, He knows the pain of crucifying yourself for another. To die is to live, and to live it to die. So, what does this have to do with Christian leadership? Everything and anything. Christian is one who follows Christ and has a personal one on one relationship with Him. What makes Christ so very different form any other, was His willingness to die for a world that didn’t care, and had no idea. It is no wonder Christianity has lasted this long, or has so many followers. People witnessed pure unselfish love in the crucifixion of Christ. People will not follow a “good righteous intelligent” person, but they will follow someone who is willing to die for them. In my book, to follow means to walk in the footsteps of another. It is our turn to walk where Christ has walked. As hard as it is for me to write this I know it is the truth, a Christian leader is one who is willingly to die in any situation no matter how big or how small for any person, no matter how high the cost. That is why I pray, Lord grant me the courage, make me willingly to die.
By: Amy Hansen
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